Dating and the widow stalker …

Updated: November 14, 2015

“The Widow Stalker”

Match.CON and the widow stalker …

About three years after Devin died I really began to see how terribly uncomfortable I was making my friends feel for “not moving on!” One day, after a conversation with a friend about my ‘unable-ness,’ I promised to give a shout. And boy did I give that a go!  An ‘A’ for effort I’ld say.

Some recaps!!

Best date: Scallops! dinner w/a man who drove two hours to see me. It was comfortable and nice…..I never had dinner/coffee/drink w/him again. I saw him one other time and it was in the woods….literally.

Worst dates: The Missing Men! I should not call them men. The boyz I NEVER met! Tons of texts, some phone conversations and plans to meet…..but, always a cancel or a no-show. A true bummer for many reasons but ultimately a huge waste of my precious time! And, after a slew of them, I started seriously wondering if these gems may be fake boyz hired by match.con to lure my widow-ass outta hiding.

Most expensive date: The car crash! A midday cup of Tea, convo and a hopeful bee-line home. Haha, not so fast, MISSY!  Hmmm…..I missed a red light, (maybe two) totaled my car, took a ride in an ambulance, (after a nice police-man issued me a ticket) and bonus, a concussion!!!  sweet….

First date: Testicular cancer talk!  Talk about walking away with a heavy heart, the saddest date ever.  A nice man tells me about his cancer, uni-ball and a bunch too much about his ex.

Can’t forget the “I Love weed date….and my $40,000 car won’t start unless I blow into this breathalyzer thingy and sometimes it JUST won’t start. It’s okay though, I have sushi and you can drink the left over wine from my last nights date!”

My Quick/awesome date before work: The artist man. Totally intrigued and impressed. Definite attraction until his psycho-girlfriend started writing me whilst pretending to be him.  And, I still get nasty messages from her…

My wimpy date: Yes, the lawyer!  I figured dinner and some legal advice.  Why not!  Haha, I’ll tell you why not.  Just as I was arriving at the restaurant/bar in my neighborhood I got a text saying “Umm, I’m not comfortable walking in your neighborhood and need to turn around.  I think I might get beat up if I go any further….sorry!”  Well, okay then…

Can’t forget about the nice guy who thought I was stalking him.  Wow!  I have to admit, stalking sounds fantastic and I hope I meet a man worthy of a serious stalking.  “Come on kids, jump in the car were going stalking today! I met an amazing man and you’re gonna call him daddy one day!”

I can thank match because I met some great people.  Mostly tho, I got quite irritated with it.  Most people are never honest and I never felt okay looking at the pictures that ‘could be real and probably old’ and reading profiles folks can buy for five bucks.  It was easy to sign-up and easy to take my money.   And, I suppose, easy to match my money with everyone else’s money for a huge profit.   When it came time to quit, holy hell in a handbasket, I couldn’t figure how to stop the subscription and suddenly cute guys my age were ‘interested’……marketing strategy?  You betcha!


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  • Trey

    I tried one of those dating sites (one which is still around BIG time) way back when; thought it was spammy & scammy way back then…nothing beats the organic spark of a connection that begins with a lifted brow across the room, or trip of a heartbeat when someone with a fantastic smile like yours lights up a room. I’m glad you’re still open to sharing your incredible story with someone. It will happen when you least expect it. I just celebrated my 11 year anniversary with my wife yesterday.

  • Christine Arsenault

    Thanks Trey.

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